Excerpts journaled in August 2010.
How can I be feeling so much emotion so quickly over someone I've just met?
What is it about him that has made me feel this way? It is like the minute he touched my hand and pulled me close to him I was gone. The words we spoke, the kisses and the intimacy was all beautiful and now in the cold light of day was it all just a drunken fling on his part? I am usually so good at keeping emotions in check, a snog or one night stand is just that, no emotion involved, usually not wanting to see them again but this time I wanted something and he, I thought, wanted the same....have I somehow managed to fall for someone who doesn't return my affections?
What is it about this one that has captured my heart, why am I so emotional over such a short daliance? It's amazing how a moment in time can have such an impact and I know those moments are rare when two single people meet and sparks seems to fly....I've finally opened up my heart again and it appears to have been broken already.....For a long time my heart has been closed and now I've invited someone in which is really saying something and it may have been rebuffed...I am already facing the realisation that my heart, now open, has been torn in two within 24 hours!....I guess in the next few days I'll know either way.....tbc...
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